Has a picture for what they want their family to be (vision) Is clear about what is important to them (values) Has practical ideas (goals) and engages in specific activities to create memories, teach their kids, learn together etc. Let me share hours of study and research with you on how we found a way to make it work for us. Is the Hughes family perfect? By Coriaria, LLC. This does not mean there will not be obstacles and setbacks as with every other strategy. What are your spiritual beliefs? We were friends in college and she is still a close friend of our family today. A meaningful life is still in the face of your children and though they aren’t verbalizing it, they desire it as much as you do. How can we go wrong? Clarifying your belief system will stabilize your approach to parenting and serve as the foundation for your intentional family life. This is where you will find the most meaning – giving yourself away. My wife is also busy teaching piano, managing a church calling (RS President), and running any one of our 5 children that are still living at home around to their many varied events. She taught us about the mandala pattern (it is from the Buddhism faith- family, eternal, circle) and showed us examples. Someone gets upset and tries to stomp off. Pinterest; Facebook; Twitter ; Click here to join"> Click here to join"> In our home, there is the word fair, and then there is the family definition of the word fair. letter to missionaries, letters to grandparents, Pay it Forward (next # of (And guess what? I did some research on Mr. Doherty. Your family needs you to step into it. Family trends. I recommend the book “Scary Close” by Donald Miller to dive deeper into the connection of service, relationships and living a productive and meaningful life. It sounded right- it felt right. It’s about defining what you want your life to look like and having a plan to move you towards that life. Laird Schaub, the executive director for an organization called the Fellowship for Intentional Communities, defines an intentional community as “a group of people living together on the basis of common values.” For their purposes, that includes religious organizations, co-operative farms, communes, and seniors … Intentional learning is defined in the text-book as: “process by which consumers set out to specifically learn information devoted to a certain subject.” An example of this is when I was in the market to buy a wide-angle lens for my camera. Intentional living is about being honest and doing what feels right for you. Latter-day Saint Women Stand Latter-day Saint Women who, without hesitation, sustain the Lord's Prophet, the Family Proclamation as doctrine, and our divine role as covenant women for Christ. And the one she posted that morning was the turning point for our family. this focus on being intentional, has made a world of difference in our family. You can redeem the lost conviction you felt at the birth of your children and redirect the course of your family’s future. The Intentional Family Moment. We know it will!). Here is a great article from ModernParentsMessyKids.com with 5 tips on how to spend quality one on one time with each of your kids. Being an elementary principal, involved in city events, on the community theater board, owning and running a small business, and active in my stake level church calling I am gone A LOT! WE DO! The intentional life, especially the family life is about serving others with your talent, skill, passion, and love. To decide these activities we handed out index cards to all the kids and had them list something they wanted to do as a family. by Spotify. Or at least I’m going to share with you how we do it. So, here’s to being intentional with your family. This blog post at RaisedGood.com is also very poignant: “I wonder if it’s because, collectively, we know simplifying is vital not only for our kid’s health, but also for our own. We are John and Allisha Hughes and we are the proud parents of 7 children, ages 8-19. The kids really surprised Allisha and I! Creating Easter traditions for our family and teaching our children God’s word is now up to my husband and me. An Intentional Family rows and steers its boat rather than being moved only by the winds and the current. The best way to intentionally discover your gifts, challenge your beliefs, learn your passion, and find joy is to serve others. Same rules, same idea, but now related to serving others. Often when one comes up, so does the other. b : having external reference. They celebrate special occasions, both large and small. We went to the store and they had to find what they needed (within a given budget). It influences your relationships, your career, and your family to your hobbies, your health, and your spirituality. Most surprising of all, perhaps, is gesture ontogeny. This is intense, intentional work because negative thinking is usually just selfish thinking. Rosenblatt sometimes used the phrase “intentional family” to describe what they’ve created. We looked up the word online.Dictionary.com defines it as done..on purpose. *Linked up with Works for Me Wednesdays (WFMW) . What are your beliefs about parenting and discipline? Raising kids is hard, but kids aren’t complicated. Ask yourself if what you believe is actually a personal conviction or is it just familiar? These Intentional Families are families who live life in pursuit of a purpose. Having said that, when you are living an intentional life, you’re going to be more conscientious about … Once I realized that not everyone has the same definition of right and wrong, I knew I needed to ask God how to be a better and more intentional parent. In an intentional manner, on purpose. Through conversations with my husband and a few friends, I decided to chronical my exploration of focused decision making, development of family traditions and rituals, and community engagement. Living an intentional life brings more benefits than I could ever capture in writing. Apple Podcasts. Definition of intentional. Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email. By taking responsibility for our own thoughts, emotions and actions, the journey of intentional living has begun. I mean, who even HAS index card boxes anymore! Allisha and I then devise a way to make the activity have a spiritual connection. They aren’t just hoping for a good family life — step-by-step, they are making a good family … Instead, consider this your permission slip to create your own schedule. Your kids are depending and waiting on you to show them the way. You need simple. Sign in Get started. I also liked the introduction. Camera lenses are expensive and they can vary from a range of a few hundred dollars to thousands of dollars. Maybe you’ve refereed a few battles over toys once or twice? Those are all wonderful activities to develop skills and creativity, but we must be mindful of how much we schedule for our kids. This article by Lisa Gungor is helpful: Why Changing What You Believe Is Actually A Sign of Strength, “ if I think about it, I realize that some of the things I have believed in for so long feel so true not necessarily because of the merit of the belief, but only because I have believed it for so long.”. Writing down personal and/or family values and keeping them in a common, visual location will keep your eyes locked on the principles for which all family decisions should be based. Allisha and I wish you amazing success on the journey and can’t wait to hear of your success and struggles! Watch Queue Queue While that seems like a far-fetched rule, it is pretty awesome how the kids will comply. And interesting book, The Idle Parent by Tom Hodgkinson, posits that parents should be more concerned with finding peace and quiet for themselves rather than entertaining their children. (Maybe a post on this sometime- as they worked REALLY well, and our kids will now ask for them from time to time). Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins (WARNING: lots of language) Man’s Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl. We found that by not properly dealing with issues in our past we were holding back from each other emotionally. three part video series from one of my virtual mentors Michael Hyatt, This article by Lisa Gungor is helpful: Why Changing What You Believe Is Actually A Sign of Strength, This blog post at RaisedGood.com is also very poignant. Very few people however do this for the vision of their life or family. Listen on . Intentional Family. It had to be something that was local (trips, etc. And soon the intentional life you felt empowered to create for the future of your child becomes barely enough to get you out of bed for 3 a.m. feedings. We didn’t do a ton of “spritiual connection” on this one as it was the first one. Families around the world are changing, many becoming smaller, as the number of single-parent households grows. Our family often gets asked about our Intentional Family mindset and why we do what we do. It does not let adolescents “do their own thing” at the expense of all family outings. This article at NoSidebar.com is particularly powerful: The Link Between Simple Living and Positive Thinking, “If there is any simple definition of positive psychology, it could be summed up in three words: other people matter.”. Faith-Based Productivity She shared this life altering quote by William J. Doherty: “Only an Intentional Family has a fighting chance to maintain and increase its sense of connection, meaning, and community over the years. There are no right or wrong answers as long as you’re true to your authentic self. Therefore, today I want to share with you some meaningful ways to celebrate Easter as a Christian family. But, we did talk about music and how it affects us. Through the Intentional Family Project, we have interviewed families who do life differently. Home-Centered Family We know that whatever you do, being intentional about it is the key. And for us, as parents, this was just as important as the activity itself. What Exactly Does That Mean. -Karaoke Night- We sang all sorts of songs and music genres, everyone got to pick their favorite. How can your spouse and kids benefit by selfless acts of service? So unterliegen bereits Tischregeln, die dem Nachwuchs beigebracht werden, oder Verbote bereits der sogenannten intentionalen Erziehung. Not only will you discover the depths of your child’s heart but they will bloom right in front of you. Intention is drowned by the tides of school presentations, soccer games, and dentist appointments, and life becomes fulfilling obligations and managing drop off and pick up times. Beginning to work on releasing our demons we learn to trust more deeply and connect more authentically. Simplicity is a rare gift in modern life. It carries over into how our children interact with each other- we ask if they are being intentional about being a family when they start teasing, being typical siblings to each other, or asked to support a sibling at a sporting or other event. I write a lot about intentional living as a way to discover the life you’ve … Each child is precious and unique and in the noise of the household chores and conflicting schedules it’s easy to forget how individual each child is. Also, kids flourish in clutterfree homes and fewer toys. Family prayers morning and night are also a constant. Anything outside work is put on autopilot and you are empty and tired with no margin for your family. Macstock Conference & Expo. But, we have learned that with some dedication and desire, it is very much a possibility! © Created by MrHughes, LLC. Then we painted our own design on our rock. And, of course, family scripture study. Google Podcasts. In a nutshell, intentional living means having an aim for how you want to live your life. Pull Weeds, Visit It creates patterns of connecting through everyday family rituals, seasonal celebrations, special occasions, and community involvement. Creating an intentional family life takes purposeful action that involves personal development and relationship building. So, what is an intentional family? The cards went on and on. Sick/Elderly, Random Acts of Kindness, Meal to a family/individual in need, people in line). Demonstrating self-forgiveness and grace for others to our children creates a grace-filled home where they know they are unconditionally accepted and valued. We look forward to sharing what we have learned in our 20 years of marriage in our quest to help YOUR family be a Home-Centered Family! Conversely, they become more complicated as their closets and playrooms fill with toys. Positive, family-centered discussions to help you live with intentionality. After making sure everyone understood what “intentional” meant, how it applied to the family, and rules of listing ideas, we began. And what a joy and privilege it is to teach our children about Jesus! ‘If this is intentional I applaud the ambitious experiment, but that doesn't undo its failure.’ ‘At line 25 he quite properly tells them that the act of violence must be intentional.’ ‘This may well be intentional since this book has been classified for historical reading.’ If you value kindness, look for ways to be kind every day (and don’t forget that self-kindness is important too!). I intentionally was removing the negative narrative in my head with positive truths about who I am and what I’m about. Address We’ll look at some practical tips and suggestions to help you create a life that’s more on your terms. Intentional living is not just about minimalism. I often feel like I need a reminder to make decisions - big and small - with the best interests of our family at heart. This video is unavailable. We knew it would have to be something that was discussed often in short bursts and yet we wanted to also engage in longer more structured activities. It’s the power of love and feeling valued that you pour into them and they give it right back. This book is all about family rituals. The title of this book should be The Intentional Family: The importance of rituals in building family ties. Let me tell you that there is always drama during an activity. Intentional living enhances every area of your life. Because of the large size of the repertoire and the relatively small number of intentional meanings it is used to achieve, ape gestures are redundant. Get your son or daughter alone, away from siblings and friends and they will open up, like a sunflower sunning itself in the light of your smile. Start to forgive. My guess is that if you have more than one kid, you hate the word “fair” as much as I do. Allisha and I spent time discussing what we wanted it to be and look like. 129 shares. It hasn’t disappeared or become less essential. Often times they will admit it is not and alter their behavior. (Please Note: Many links are affiliate links which allow us to offset the cost of running our site.). This article at the ArtofManliness.com offers great tips on how to craft such a statement. Orangeville, UT 84537. “An Intentional Family is one whose members create a working plan for maintaining and building family ties and then implement the plan as best they can. I write a lot about intentional living as a way to discover the life you’ve always wanted, but it’s not to feed your ego or to seek only your own happiness. The hard part was deciding what exactly that meant for the Hughes family. It also requires time and effort, and may mean compromising busy individual schedules in order to strengthen family bonds, which then decrease the number of incidents where family members feel taken for granted. The two definitely go hand in hand but you can be intentional about something you value like spending more time talking on the phone with your grandmother without ever having to minimize your belongings. 2 a : of or relating to epistemological intention. What would it look like to stop drifting and start designing the life you want? It means teaching my children to be respectful, to do what is right, and to find ways to connect with other people. During our first family home evening of the month, a card is drawn. We are fairly consistent as well- though looking back now, it was a speed reading event to “get it done” until just a few months ago. Keeping our family on the “home-centered” path is a daily adventure. But, as we are taught in the scriptures, if we will “prove the Lord herewith” that we will rise up with the leavening of the gospel in our lives and we will be blessed just for trying. Learn more. Family time is grocery shopping and car rides to church. One way I want to be an intentional parent is to be a present parent. It’s a lie that our children need to constantly be stimulated with music and dance lessons, sports camps, play dates, and art classes. It’s central to keeping their vision focused. FOR. They aren’t swayed by social pressures and chaotic schedules. That means we do things on purpose to make our family stronger and healthier. Being attentive with your kids and spouse will energize you more that a power nap on the couch before dinner. Today's question is: "What Does It Mean To Be An Intentional Family?" … As we enjoyed our meal, we talked about teamwork, responsibility, and the importance of doing our best with assignments. Confused? Give your child your undivided attention and you will learn what they need from you, their role is in the family, and how you can support and develop that role. Next, we came home and each team had to prepare their portion of the meal. To solve the longer, structured activities, we settled on one monthly activity. Consider these 8 key elements to an intentional family life that will engage your children, rebuild intimacy with your spouse, and create the meaningful family life your infant inspired. Your kids need simple. Each team had an assignment for a different part of the meal. The International Day of Families is observed on the 15 May every year. The International Family Law Group LLP is a solicitor's practice looking after the interests of families and children with a specific focus on international families – those who travel, live and have connections in different countries around the world. This isn’t exactly the meaningful life that you envisioned in the maternity ward. How perfect is THAT?We talked about each word and how it could and should apply to the meaning of family. A few months ago I was talking with my mom about how I was learning to reprogram my thinking from self-doubt and negativity to confidence and positive self talk. For us, we truly wanted to ensure our kids knew what the word intentional meant. This mindset, It’s an obvious message, and when we hear it, we can’t help but shout YES.”. Whether you agree with the author’s position or not, it’s a very interesting read. It’s such a powerful means of adding … Cookies for the Neighbors, shovel snow, yard work, FHE with another family, I wanted to learn more about what being an intentional family was, what it really meant, and even bought his book, The Intentional Family: Simple Rituals to Strengthen Family Ties. Sharree has long been someone I admire and look up to in life. Children have the profound ability to dramatically affect the lives of their parents with nothing but a cry and deep breath. My wife and I knew that we needed something more for our family. Let me share some examples of the activities and how we connected them to a spiritual principle or teaching. Where do you stand on social and political issues? Instantly, life was never the same and everything that was important yesterday fades in the glow of newborn skin. Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink & Leif Babin. “At heart, the Intentional Family is a ritualizing family. Most businesses and churches have mission statements or a set of values which their organization is founded upon. Your kids are aching for an intentional life that speaks to them of unconditional love, security, purpose, and worthiness and they won’t find it displayed on a screen anywhere. When you choose to be kind, you’re making an intentional choice about the type of person you want to be. Pioneering, right? We are working at becoming more intentional with one on one time with each of our girls and without fail every minute we get alone with our daughters we feel humbled by their minds, hearts, and imagination; each so different and perfect reflections of God. When we returned home (after a dislocated shoulder…long story) my wife had everyone gather at the table. The Cambridge dictionary defines intention as “ something that you want and plan to do; an aim .”. Intended or planned; done deliberately or voluntarily.. Video shows what intentional means. {The family} is willing to look at how it handles Christmas or bar mitzvahs in order to make them work better for everyone. (And a constant battle to avoid “vain repetition” and truly speak with the Lord). by Spotify. “At heart, the Intentional Family is a ritualizing family. One of the simplest ways to be intentional every day is to do something that brings you joy. DO SOMETHING THAT BRINGS YOU JOY. intentional definition: 1. planned or intended: 2. planned or intended: . It creates patterns of connecting through everyday family rituals, seasonal celebrations, special … We heard about and tried out monthly parents/child interviews on Sundays to spend some parent/child time and help, teach, and express our love. As we started, we realized that we also wanted to do intentional service activities. All Rights Reserved. Heavens NO! Welcome! Imagine how freedom from your past can benefit your family life. You remember the feeling, that the birth of your firstborn was a wake-up call to grow up and do something meaningful. Who has that kind of energy? Forgive yourself, forgive others, and extract a positive lesson that can propel you toward the life you are working so hard for. It sounds harsh and anti-intentional, but actually it’s purpose is two-fold – the parents don’t lose themselves in raising overprotected kids and the children develop wild imaginations and self sufficiency that serves them for their lifetime. Not only will their full schedules burn out their will and enjoyment but it will kill your intentional living pursuit. She always posts the most thought provoking spiritual thoughts that she has unearthed in her gospel study. Don’t compare your life to friends, family, or strangers on the Internet. Then, we review the calendar and a date is scheduled so there aren’t any conflicts. “An Intentional Family does not let meal times deteriorate into television watching. Children have the profound ability to dramatically affect the lives of their life or family come spend. At least I ’ m going to do- Hughes Style the teaching in Ephesians 5:10 to each area you! 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